Local Newsfeed

“At 5:10 last night, Yvette Deerfield liked a rival company’s business statement. Her employers deliberated for some time, and at 5:20, demanded her resignation. In a stroke of brilliant self-promotion, Deerfield turned in her resignation at 5:18.

In sports, Yvette replaced her usual run with an impromptu standing session. Good for you, Yvette! Work those glutes! Here’s Radha with the weather.”

“Thank you, Pocket. No unusual perspiration today. The current regimen is working for now. We’re nearing the end of the monthly cycle, so stay tuned for further developments. Back to you, Pocket.”
“Thanks Radha. In romance, Yvette’s last date was a /doozy/! If she-”

Yvette’s walls blinked blue. She sighed, popping another cube. Chewing slowly, she flicked her wrist.

“Please tell me you watched it! I’ve never seen something so embarrassing!”

“No, who was it? Pothole or Dronemama?”
“Gargarbage. Don’t tell me you were listening to the local feed again. I can’t believe you’re so narcissistic, babe.”

“I was listening to yours, actually.”

“…that’s a lie, but it’s really flattering. You’re forgiven. Now watch it with me.”

Prompt: Local


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